


Vanity

by anewkindofthrill



Category: In the Flesh (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Lingerie, M/M, Oral Sex, Power Dynamics, Warming Up, getting domestic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-18
Updated: 2014-08-18
Packaged: 2018-02-13 17:08:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2158557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anewkindofthrill/pseuds/anewkindofthrill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>About building a relationship, developing and adapting to new roles, about warming up to each other. Because they love each other with every inch of their cold, dead hearts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Vanity

No one knows why Amy's warming up has developed so fast. Shirley Wilson would say it was because Amy's heart had always been warm, no matter if beating or not. She'd smile wistfully and think about the cheery, pretty woman she accepted as her daughter - after her second death.

If this is true, then Kieren's and Simon's hearts are cold as ice. Yes, there is some trembling in their hands, they already feel the wind blowing through their hair, but Kieren's skin is still so cold, Simon's eyes are so white.

They find that they don't really mind. Cold, dead hearts can love, too.

During the weeks and months of their weird half-undead-half-living state, Kieren and Simon learn some things about each other and themselves.

For instance, Kieren is the driving force in everything they do. That has been pretty clear since the beginning; he initiates their kisses, he starts their fights, he apologises first. Kieren himself doesn't really know why; if you looked at them, you would think Simon with his intense stare and his predatory posture would be the dominant in this relationship.

Well, in one dominion of the relationship, he is.

But we are looking at the couple in bright daylight now, when Kieren tells Simon what to get at the supermarket

(They can already consume liquids and mushed things, and Simon often says he feels like a "feckin toddler", eating only porridge and mushed banana. They are at the Walkers' when he says that, both of them eating their baby food like the good boys they are, and Simon suddenly states he is craving some medium rare, bloody steak, which elicits mildly horrified stares from Sue and Steve, some eye-rolling from Kieren and half a snort, half a giggle from Jem.

Kieren, on the other hand, finds it quite fitting that they're eating baby food after their 'second birth'. Or, rather, during it. It's a really long process, somehow.)

or when Kieren tells Simon what clothes to buy.

(Kieren is actually a little bit vain. He grooms his hair and prefers skinny jeans. He likes his fashion sense, he likes his oversized coat and his boots that scream working class hero and ladism and indie pop-rock.

Don't say he looks _Britpop_. Britpop is definitely _over_ and anyone who says otherwise has _absolutely no idea._ But if you compare him to Damon Albarn, he will smile. He thinks Damon was hot back in the days.

Simon, on the other hand, owns only a handful of clothes he got from the ULA, mostly very ill-fitting. So when the government decided to pay the PDS sufferers for their still obligatory work during the Give Back Scheme - "so we cannot use the word 'slave' when we want to riot," Simon growls - Kieren decided they will use their money for new clothes for Simon. Jem develops a little crush on Simon after that - he _does_ look striking in a dark t-shirts, slim jeans and leather jackets. Kieren silently wishes his boyfriend could grow a beard, but he doesn't complain - Simon is definitely the hottest piece of ass in a 100 miles radius now. Well, he has already been before, but now everyone can see it, too.

Jem's crush is, well, crushed only three days after Model-Simon's first appearance at the Walkers', when she catches him reading a poem to Kieren, having stopped by the bungalow in order to visit them. Well, it's cute and stuff, but so pretentious and definitely _not cool_.)

Simon actually doesn't mind. He likes doing stuff for Kieren even out of the "I will do anything for you to let our undying love for each other be eternal"-context. Sometimes, he will get annoyed at Kieren's almost extreme tidyness or his complaining about other people, about the house ("Bungalow, it's a damn bungalow and the cold is getting in, Jesus Christ _shut the fucking door_ , Simon!") and living dead life in general. But he's happy most of the time.

They're good together. Really good, right the way they are. Simon's cold, dead heart bursts with love when he looks at Kieren, and Kieren's melancholic, hard eyes get all warm, his white face glowing with a smile, when he looks at Simon.

And eventually, the sun will go down.

~

At night, power dynamics change a bit.

Okay, a lot.

Wind in their hair and cold coming through the door _("Damnit, SIMON!")_ aren't the only things they start feeling during those weird, wonderful, scary months of warming up.

(To each other.)

To Simon's delight, they find out that Kieren can not only be demanding, but also greedy. And Simon wouldn't be Simon if he weren't, well, _generous_. He would give his everything to Kieren everytime he asks, but Kieren loves his boyfriend with every inch of his cold, dead heart, and he relishes in the fact that he can be himself with Simon. Or anyone, _anything_ he wants, Simon would accept, adore, devour it all.

So some nights, he would get out some things he acquired when Simon was looking for new strings for his guitar while shopping. He'd wrap himself in laces and silk, vain, oh so vain and proud and in love because Simon taught him how to be proud, how to be in love again, and he'd lie down onto their bed, waiting for his silly, brave, stoic partner.

He was highly embarrassed the first time he did this, only ever fantasizing about things like that, and worse/better things even, fantasizing back in the living days, when he knew he'd never could do something like that with his "best mate".

But with Simon, he feels free not only to lead, but to be led, not only to dominate, but to be dominated, to accept himself as someone who likes both.

Also, he wants to be pretty for his handsome man.

So, during the first time in panties and stockings, he waited for Simon on the bed, feeling so stupid, so idiotic, _what if he laughs at me, oh my god I don't even know if he's into that, what if he doesn't think this is pretty,_ but all of this suddenly stopped when Simon stood in the door frame, mouth slightly agape, taking in black seductive fabric contrasting wonderfully on white porcelain skin, and Kieren started smiling, almost a bit darkly.

For the next unmeasurable amount of time, Kieren was not allowed to get up on his own. When he wasn't lying on his back, it was because Simon turned him, pulled him onto his knees so he could take him from behind, over and over, until he missed his beautiful angel's face, so Kieren was positioned on his back again, black clad knees very close to his face.

He took it all and screamed for more. Begged and demanded more and _more_.

Simon was somehow aware of his mildly animalistic behaviour, but as soon as he saw that Kieren seemed to enjoy himself immensely ("oh God Simon, never stop, PLEASE NEVER STOP"), he didn't care. He didn't care if they were human or monsters, if they were men or women or both or neither, if their age differed, he didn't care about anything in the world except this beautiful creature under him, that gave himself to him gift-wrapped, that trusted him so much. He licked the bare thighs above black, lacy fabric, he bit into soft flesh that guarded the entrance he'd penetrate thoroughly in this night, over and over again, he pushed away knickers to get to the cock that finally, _finally_ rised on its own.

"Please Simon, give it to me, I'm gonna be good for you."

That pretty mouth smiled its innocent smile before opening, offering, and Simon couldn't believe for a moment, but then, this is Simon and he's nothing if not a believer, so that faded quickly that night as he fucked his boyfriend's mouth, savouring the moans around his cock and giving the greedy boy what he wanted.

The break he needed was used very efficiently for staring silently at Kieren, all debauched and needy. He looked down that trembling, thin body of _his_ and saw that Kieren had come, too. He'd probably sneaked down his hand when finishing Simon.

Simon tilted his head, still staring. "You are not to do that again, Kieren. I'm the one who is making you come." His voice was seemingly calm, but the undertone of it sent down shivers Kieren's spine, and his cock twitched.

"Yes."

They then continued this night's - and other nights' - activities, Kieren wanting, never sated, oddly reminded of a hunger he already knows, and Simon gave, Simon took, Simon owned.

~

Kieren often thinks they are making each other better. _Balancing_ each other out.

He is sitting on the couch in their living room, Simon's head in his lap, as Simon holds a book and reads something about how human beings are to strive for more, to raise higher. He is still full of idealism and faith and both of them know he holds onto pretentiousness and hollow words because he is afraid of falling back into the hole he can only fill up with addiction or false promises.

Simon's heart has always been cold and dead, even during the time it was beating.

Kieren understands that, since his heart is the same. He only temporarily filled it with things he called love - and when those things died, he decided to die with them.

Now they are both accepting themselves as what they are - and the return of a heartbeat won't change that.

But by doing so, by being a mirror for the other, they grow and find more sustainable, reliable means to feel a little bit of warmth, Kieren realises when he brushes away some strands of dark hair - is it a little bit longer than some weeks ago? He realises that it is okay to be selfish, to be demanding and greedy and wanting it all, never letting go.

Because, well, life is short, and they miss the warm heart that should be in their midst.

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, this was pointless, everything I wanted was to write kinky zombie sex. But my stupid intellectual aspirations always want to add some... sense. Yeah, vanity, pretentiousness and stuff. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it anyway! Feedback is always extremely appreciated. You can find me on Tumblr under anewkindofthrill, too.


End file.
